A Conundrum

I've never heard much about torture until the past year. It isn't that I didn't know it existed, or that it happened. It's just that it was never really brought up. But for some reason, I've been hearing about it for a little while. Some people agree with it, obviously, and other's don't. Which is perfectly fair, we are all entitled to our own opinions. So, here's mine.

I believe torture is wrong. I guess I'll start there. I don't know the in's and out's of "military intelligence" and I don't know their reasoning and rational behind it, but from a "civilian's perspective" I don't see the purpose of it. How are you to know that the information you are trying to drag out of said prisoner is right? And how do you know that if by torturing and/or eventually killing someone will save thousands of lives in the future? It seems like a lot of speculation and he said/she said, especially if you are talking about causing someone, anyone no matter their status severe physical discomfort.

I mean, imagine if someone you loved hung with the wrong crowd. And maybe they made some mistakes, or had some knowledge of something they maybe shouldn't have known. Would you like someone to do that to your loved one? I've heard someone say "what if by torturing one person, we save thousands of lives." I say: impossible. Who are you to know that by your evil act, you are saving anyone? You don't. Only God know's the future. I don't believe the end's justify the means. We aren't gods who should try to control destiny, no matter how "good" our intentions. We need to leave that to the God.

I'm not guru on this topic, but this is my humble opinion. I would hate it if my mother or father or brother or sisters did something terribly wrong that could endanger someone. But at the end of the day, I don't want anyone hurting them. Maybe if those people who are doing the torturing would just imagine their own son or daughter or husband or wife in that chair, on the receiving end, they would think about things differently.

. . . Or maybe Jesus just needs to come and give us all the right answers? :)

Letterman Vs. Palin. Say What?

Ok, I have something to talk about now.

I'm not sure we all have heard, but most people are aware at least of the whole David Letter vs. Sarah Palin "fued." So much to be said about this, but I'll just stick to the basics.

First of all, I don't know why anyone, ever, in any form of the media, puts any stock in what these late night people say/do. They are there purely for entertainment. A lot of what they say (or should I say what their writers tell them to say) is inappropriate, and shouldn't ever be said. They still say it. And people still laugh... that doesn't at all excuse his joke, because any jab, whatsoever, about children and older men and sex is just wrong. (He tries to excuse it by saying he was talking about Bristol, her 18 yr old daughter, but to me, that doesn't make it any better) However, all this uproar from Palin isn't really necessary.

That being said, I think all comedians, everywhere, should just stop making jokes about Sarah Palin and any member of the Palin family. (That may cut about 50% of their actually funny material, but hey, there are other stupid people they can poke fun at, and if all else fails they can fall back on the most popular comedic cushion: Bush, ;) ) Everytime they, or anyone, say anything about her, it gives her a reason to resurface and once again reveal the magnificant stupidity is Palin. Yes, the joke(s) were not appropriate, and yes, David Letterman has said, I'm sure, a lot of somewhat inappropriate things. But people! We don't want to give Sarah Palin a platform, of any kind, ever. We want her to disappear into media oblivion, only to reappear if (God forbid) she decides to run in 2012 (not seeing it...)

This is all I have to say on the subject. :)

Battle of the Eyelids

Welcome to the Sabbath Day.

I am sitting in this desk chair, struggling against the battle of the eye lids. I think we are just about tied right now, but they are truly putting up a fight. To that, I must give them credit where credit is due.

At any rate... besides being supremely exhausted (which is my own fault. I knew I had to be up at 6, but I still chose to not go to bed till 1. For shame), I'm very excited! I've been searching high and low for a good internship for next summer. And look at what God did? He got me one for this summer with a brand-new magazine. It's an online version (for now), and it's just what I was looking for. I'm so excited to see what happens with it, because to me it seems like a very good idea! It launches in the fall, so look for it. (I'll tell you more as it progresses).

As the battle of the eye lid's rages on . . .

I will probably write something again when I have an epiphany or something. :)

God Has Not Abandoned You

Two days in a row! Yeah! Whose the boss! Haha.

Do you ever feel like God has abandoned you? I personally have never felt like that, but many many times, I feel like I have abandoned God. I do wonder why He brought me where I am, or what he expects me to do with my life, but I've never felt like I couldn't turn to Him. That may be because I have yet to experience anything Earth shatteringly traumatic, but then again, I feel that if I did, it would only make me turn to God more. I tend to do that when I'm having a mental break down. I search the Bible and God for comfort, and I usually find it.

I don't have much to add to that, so here are some song lyrics to lift you up, :)

Classic Jeremy Camp song, holds beautiful truth that we all need to continue to remember.

I Still Believe

Scattered words and empty thoughts
Seem to pour from my heart
I've never felt so torn before
Seems I don't know where to start

But it's now that I feel Your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain

'Cause I still believe in Your faithfulness
'Cause I still believe in Your truth
'Cause I still believe in Your Holy Word
Even when I don't see, I still believe

Though the questions still fog up my mind
With promises I still seem to bear
For even when answers slowly unwind
It's my heart I see You prepare

But it's now that I feel Your grace fall like rain
From every fingertip washing away my pain

'Cause I still believe in Your faithfulness
'Cause I still believe in Your truth
'Cause I still believe in Your Holy Word
Even when I don't see, I still believe

Well the only place I can go is into Your arms
Where I throw to You my feeble prayers
Well in brokenness I can see that this is Your will for me
Well help me to know that You are near

'Cause I still believe in Your faithfulness
'Cause I still believe in Your truth
'Cause I still believe in Your Holy Word
Even when I don't see, 'cause I still believe

'Cause I still believe
'Cause I still believe
I still believe, I still believe

Well I still believe
I still believe
I still believe

In This Day to Day

Someone asked me today what I wanted to be remembered as . . . (Ok that wasn't the exact question, but that was the main gist of it, and they weren't just asking me, but you get the point) . . .

Obviously, most people don't want to get recognized for anything negative (unless they are a crazy in the brain). Most people want to be remembered as givers, as comedians, and friends. A lot of people want to be remembered for what they've done, some for who they are. I said that I wanted to be remembered as someone who made people laugh and feel good, and someone who was a giver. But I wonder if I'm actually living that everyday? If we stopped and thought about our actions throughout our day, how we interact with those around us, would we be pleased? Would the last words that come out of our mouths define us? Or would they just be ... meaningless?

I don't mean we always have to talk philosophically and speak to impress, but, I think that we should be more conscientious about our daily legacy. I mean, it's good to consider the big picture, consider what our overall world impression will be, but I think our daily legacy is our ultimate legacy. When you walk away from someone, from a conversation or a situation, how does the other person feel?

I want my day to day legacy to be . . . amazing. I've never been that conscientious of it, but now I really wanna try to be. I want people to walk away from me feeling uplifted, not deflated. I want to put a smile on someone's face with my attitude, with my actions, with my overall attitude. I may not do that now, but maybe I should try.

So, what's your day to day legacy? Are you going to live the way you want to be remembered, or are you only living for the moment?

Just A Thought

I'm trying to blog everyday. Apparently it will help my future career. Here's hoping!

Anyway, I'm reading the book "The Purpose Driven Life." (I know, a little late since it's been a best seller for a third of an eternity) Someone told me that this book was only for people who were "like atheist or not christian or something. Not for someone who has been raised in the church." End quote. I was so... surprised when this person said that. But then again, I wasn't really surprised. Christians think that once they become Christian, or they have been raised Christian, they are and have the ultimate authority. I mean, sure, not all of us are like that, but many are, and it can be very irritating, and sad. We are always learning, always growing, always.

Well, like I said, I've been reading this book. And it's really good. It's simple, anyone who is reading it can understand what he is saying, where he is coming from. It really helps you to think practically, and he is always quoting the Bible, showing that what he is saying isn't just coming from him.

I thought I'd share that. I'm trying to blog everyday, I guess so I can just keep a mental record of my life and such (since I am quite sure that no one else reads this, haha). And by the way, I did take the picture above. I thought it was nice, ;)

May God be your strength!

How Deep the Father's Love for Us...

Have you ever really listened to the words of the song "How Deep the Father's Love For Us?" I listen to that song quite often, and today, for whatever reason, it really hit me. I mean, I don't completely get it, but I get it. You know?

None of us truly deserve the intensity of God's love. We may think that we do, by some brave action we've done, or by some good deed we've committed. But, in the larger scope of things, those are so very insignificant to the many many many things we do on a daily basis that do not represent Christ. And yet, even as we sin, even as we go about as if God doesn't exist, He loves us. The painstaking, never-give-up, tough love that we hardly ever acknowledge. It's mind blowing.

Even now, I keep trying to wrap my mind around it and I can't. How can God, who knows that he took the time to create us, mold us and shape us stand by and watch us disown him with our words, with our actions, and not just... strike us down? Is His heart that big? Is His love that strong? What kind of love is that? Can we even call that love? I mean, is there a bigger, stronger, louder, bolder word that can express that kind of love that humanity itself is incapable of? Such a word does not exist. Maybe Jesus will teach it to us in heaven.

I think that God gave us music. And not just any music, but specifically the music of some Christian artists (not all of them...). Sometimes, I'll read the Bible, and I'll be blessed, of course. But then I'll hear a song that talks about almost the same thing, and I'll just sit there in awe. I've got "How Deep The Father's Love For Us" in my head, on repeat right now. It's the version by Phillips, Craig and Dean. I believe this trio is truly ordained by God. The words of the songs that they sing are so powerful, you know? Anyway, here's the words to the song, and a link if you want to have a listen. :)

How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that helf Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I knoww that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast inJesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom...

Listen Here.

I may never really get it. The vastness, the depth, of God's love, but I'd like to think that that's ok. I'd like to think that He'll just keep on loving me, even if I don't understand it. :)